See, the good of the world has never stopped reinforcing how the colour of your skin (or hair for this matter), where you come from, or your gender does not for one second inhibit our right to equal opportunities in the society. EQUAL OPPORTUNITIES YOU SAY? Well, let me enlighten you to how having black hair, chinky eyes, yellow skin and being short renders us incapable of doing some things without "that is sooo asian" written all over your face.
The 10 commandments to avoiding the asian stereotype.
- DO NOT even think about dying your hair jet black unless you want to look extremely, extremely, utterly asian, or from China.
- NEVER walk anywhere in public with a camera in your hand. -unless you REALLY are a tourist..
- DO NOT get bangs. (Somewhat debatable- the "cool kids" policy overwrites this rule)
- DO hang around in huge groups of asians if you want to be rendered as a FOB
- DO impress the aussies with a few sentences of chinese to give them the impression that you are 'cultured'. ohh, we love our culture dont we.
- NEVER walk anywhere in public with a camera in your hand. You dont understand how imperative this rule is..
- DO use chopsticks. This is the best way to impress anyone who is not chinese.
- DO NOT carry a backpack and wear sneakers together at any one time. FOBs allowed only.
- DO try to not say "is it?" -this has to be the biggest giveaway even if you aren't asian.
- FOR CRYING OUT LOUD DO NOT SQUAT IN PUBLIC. pleasee.
Follow these 10 commandments religiously and i assure you that you may not be the stereotypical asian anymore, but you will still be ridiculously teased about your height, your mum's accent and your chinese name.
Alright it's not all that bad.. we invented THE PARACHUTE AND FIREWORKS AND THE COMPASS AND MANY OTHER THINGS.. WE ARE VERY COOL.
1 comment:
hahaha i shall refer to this guide lest i begin to transcend into fob asianess. but we both know im too cool to have that happen eh?
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